To run or not to run

To run or not to run

Written 15 April, 2016.

It’s been a crazy couple of weeks with lots going on and I can’t believe it’s finally here, I am writing this two days before the Brighton Marathon – eeek!

I had a week and a half in New Jersey and New York (my first time in the Big Apple!) recently which was really great to get a change of running scenery. I have blogged before about running in new places but it’s just not something I ever did before the last year or two and it’s a totally different way of seeing a city and spending time somewhere, especially if you are on your own. A few years ago I would have thought I was mad for taking my running kit away on holiday with me but now it's always part of my trip.

I managed to drag my friend (thanks Bex!) out painfully early (which, as with all these early running starts, impacted the night before as I didn’t really drink at dinner and anxiously went to bed at 12:30am worrying about the late night) to Nike running club NYC. I felt a bit mad for doing it at the time (I guess it’s not what most people would do on a weekend in New York), but I knew if we didn’t do it I would regret it. Not really feeling up to a 12 miler as per my marathon plan, and having not really taken the distance seriously the evening before, I was glad when we got there and were told the distances were adjusted and I could do an eight mile route. Unfortunately there was a race on in Central Park so we couldn’t run there, which I had been soooo looking forward to and has been a bit of an ambition of mine, but we had a great river run through the pouring rain and Bex and I finished up at the Brooklyn Diner for a proper New York breakfast! So smug with ourselves afterwards.

Since then I’ve been in the final week of tapering which has been utter hell. I wrote about this last year and I have since read many other blogs encountering the same feelings but it seems that oftentapering is a emotional roller-coaster. I woke up on Monday not feeling great, although I wasn’t really surprised since everyone I encounter on my commute and in my office seems to be coughing and spluttering their way through London, and just got worse through the week. At first I thought I had just suffered a bit from tiredness and jetlag and I’m not really sure what’s wrong, maybe I’ve just been fighting a bug, but I’ve felt weak, headachey and unable to swallow properly. Thankfully my boss has been really understanding and I worked from home for a few days to try and be as mentally and physically rested as possible, but it’s been a horrible angst ridden weak – on Wednesday I could barely walk around the park out the front of my flat so I started trying to think about how I was going to cope with pulling out to prepare myself. I’ve started to feel better, although still dizzy and under the weather, so am back trying to visualise myself doing this. I just can’t waste 17 weeks of training and I know I have nothing to prove to anyone, but unless I am incapable of getting out of bed, I may as well do myself the justice of turning up to the finish line to give this thing a go despite the fact that this morning I struggled with a 1.4 mile run...

Fingers crossed anyway, one more day to keep recovering and if I turn up and run a few miles, or if I run it in a much longer time than expected then the whole experience has still been an achievement .I am lucky to have lots of wonderfully supportive friends and family, many of whom are travelling to Brighton for the weekend, so I really want to give it my best. Good luck to everyone else running, and especially to Megan and Sam who are gonna totally smash it!

What it feels like to quit a marathon

What it feels like to quit a marathon